Père et Fille. Jean-Marc and Jackie (did you read her letter on maquillage?). Tomorrow, March 29th, is Chief Grape's 45th birthday!
la prise de conscience (preez-deuh-kon-see-uhns)
: realization
Audio File: listen to Jean-Marc read the French words below: Download MP3 or Wav file
Cette prise de conscience était un peu troublante. Il parait que ma peau a vignt ans de plus que moi. This realization was a bit troubling. Apparently my skin is twenty years older than I am.
A Day in a French Life… by Kristin Espinasse
She said I need to reapply sunblock every two hours, that when I drive I should put on a long-sleeved (linen) veste in summertime, and that I might consider having the windows in my home (where I work) coated with ultraviolet window film. But the kicker was, she said I have an old peau… She did say that, didn't she?
Standing in the dermato's office, I watch the scrutinizing regard of the doctor, who does not avert her eyes when delivering the conviction: "Vous êtes plus jeune que votre peau!"
Because she says the word "jeune" several times in the same paragraph, I initially take it as flattery. Since when was middle age "young"? …But then the words begin to translate themselves, as French words do, slowly… surely—tick, tick, tick—until, like a grenade, they explode with meaning.
She never said I was young… she said I was younger than my skin… which I guessed, was old!
"44 year-old woman". Photo taken 4 weeks ago… those are stitches from the second basal cell surgery. My forehead is coming along, too…
.
No need to guess any further, the dermato is blunt: "You have prematurely old skin! Votre peau a vingt ans de plus que vous!"
I am tempted to shush her up, tempted to claim and enforce that universal rule of tact, only, reason tells me that tact is sometimes nothing more than a tool for illusionists: it is magician's smoke! I don't want Houdini, I want Dr H, whose higher goal it is–in telling me the truth about my skin–to prevent further dégâts.
Dr H. says I will need to catch up to my skin's age! The good news is I have twenty years to do so…. Meantime, I will need to slow down the "advancement" of my cellules–and prevent further skin cancers associated with older skin–by slathering on the sunblock, closing the curtains in my bright office, and staying out of the sun.
(It is a strange new goal, that of trying to catch up one's biological age to one's physical age! Weren't the two the same?)
The other good news was that the third mysterious growth (or the purpose of my doctor visit) turned out to be a harmless angiome–and not another invasive cell. OUF!).
I pay the doctor 42 euros, thank her for the "reassurance", and leave the office. When I get into my car I look into the rear-view mirror….
First, the crows feet leap out. Gosh, the lines around my eyes are deeper than I remembered their being… my skin looks tired, too.
I have the desire to google "44-year-old skin" or "44-year-old woman" just to see what I should look like. What, after all, should I look like?
In the end, I resist the urge to let google toy with my emotions. I am strong, tough as leather, and you might even say I have the skin to prove it.
French Vocabulary
père et fille = father and daughter
joyeux anniversaire = happy birthday
la veste = jacket
le/la dermato (dermatologue) = dermatologist
Vous êtes plus jeune que votre peau = you are younger than your skin
Votre peau a vingt ans de plus que vous = your skin is twenty years older than you are
les dégâts (m) = damage
une cellule = cell
un angiome = angioma (a benign tumor made up of blood vessels). Our son Max was born with a dime-size bright red "angiome" on his forehead. The doctors referred to it as "une fraise" (a strawberry)
ouf! = phew!
Another snapshot from Chief Grape's USA wine tour. Here is Jean-Marc with Alex and Joanne Polner. Photo taken at Vestry Wines in NYC.
Discover more from French Word-A-Day
Subscribe to get the latest posts sent to your email.
Hey, Kristin –
You — and your skin — look like you’re both in your early 30s. Don’t worry about it.
I mean, do what the doctor says, and take all the precautions, but don’t let it get to you.
Joyeux anniversaire!Happy Birthday!Feliz Aniversário,Jean-Marc!!!
Kristin, you look great!An awesome soul you are,be sure! 😉
Greetings from Brésil
I think your skin is fabulous, I think you look comfy in it, and you are an absolute knockout. Expression lines are who we are. We should all look so wonderful as you.
Happy Happy Birthday Jean-Marc! May you live long and prosper!
Happy Birthday and many happy returns of the day Chief Grape. 45? c’est rien.
…. and Chief Grapesse, don’t worry about a few stitches. We’ve been there too, they’ll soon fade. We just have to remember that we white-skinned humans did not evolve in sunny climes and we just have to always look for shade – or move to Finland.
Kindest regards, Peter Jackson
Calvados.
I really enjoy your blogs, and would like to continue at my new e-mail address. I cannot see where I can make this change.
Can you change it with this request?
susan@dbmail.com
(formerly ici.susan@yahoo.com)
Merci bien,
Susan Kuntz
Kristin you look beautiful and your skin does not look old! In fact most French women look much older than they are because of all the tanning that goes on here. But not you!
You are a beautiful woman Kristin, and will be for the rest of your life. Try and disregard the age difference between you and your skin, but DO do what the doctor has asked of you.
I’m sitting in Lauzerte at the moment (Tarn et Garonne) and the weather is beautiful too. I’ve been working in my garden and have popped in the house for a rest.
I’m 71 this July and suddenly realised I’m an old man trying very hard not to be, I have to take it easier.
Happy birthday to Chief Grape and I hope you all have a happy day.
Love and kisses,
David
Kristin: you and Jean-Marc look like fresh lively teenagers from my perspective!
Bon courage et bon anniversaire.
Kevin (66 ans – et mon peau a le meme age que moi!!)
J’espère que quelqu’un vous a conseillé de éviter soigneusement l’exposition de vos cicatrices au soleil pendant les six mois prochains. La peau est sensible au cours du rétablissement et elle peut développer des pigmentations laides.
Bonne chance,
David
Joyeux anniversaire Jean-Marc! Bonne fete! Best wishes from Boston 🙂 I’m sure you will have a wonderful day!
Bonne anniversaire, Jean-Marc, vraiment le Chief Grape! Know you will be/are happy to be reunited with your dear family after your wine tour. Cheers and best wishes for happiness, health and contined success in all areas of your life!
Chere Kristen, you are on the mend, as G.O.R.G.E.O.U.S. as ever!, and I for one appreciate the important reminder your surgeries and your willingness to share the experience have offered us about the need for sun protection. I hope you are insisting that the delicate skin of your children be protected as well! Tanning is not “beautiful” anymore, as was the case when I grew up. We are smarter now, but so many ignore the warnings.
Happy Birthday Jean-Marc and everyone’s right – you look great Kristin and definitely not 44. – wish I was!
Angela in Sussex
Hi Kristin–you would make a good Australian–I had a bit of my ear ‘scraped’ this week, to check for nasty things. BCC’s are very common here, on face and arms. To be a good Australian you have to boast about your sports injury and your skin cancers. Americans all have their mental therapists, Australian all have their physiotherapists! The French all have their favourite restaurant–much more sensible!!
ps–my wife and I have three grown-up beautiful daughters, so we are well qualified to say that your daughter is stunning!
Yes you look fabulous and young and your skin radiant!! Just heed the Dr’s advice re staying out to the sun during those harmful UV times.
Bonne Anniversaire to Chief Grape – may you all have a wonderful day and may he be spoilt rotten!!
Caroline in Melbourne, Australia
Dear Kristi,
I fully agree with the views expressed above that your skin doesn’t look 20 years older than the rest of you. Quite the opposite!
See you this summer in the shade of the mulberry tree, I hope.
Bonne Anniversaire, Jean-Marc! Et Kristen tu es tellement belle! Ne t’inquiete pas de tes “crows-feet”……A better name for them is “smile lines”….and don’t forget: Wrinkles only show where the smiles have been, and that you have lived!!!
Happy Birthday Jean Marc. Please tell Kristin that she needs the Vit D from the sun so might have to balance the amount of sunblock. She looks a v young 44 yr old!
lovely photo of Dad and daughter.
Alice – Oxford UK
EVER NOTICE HOW “LUCK” HAPPENS FOR PEOPLE WHO WORK AT WHAT IS IMPORTANT IN LIFE. HOW THEY GET ALL THE BREAKS WHEN THEY THEY CONSIDER THE FEELINGS OF OTHERS. THIS FAMILY LIVES THE KIND OF LIFE THAT MANY OF US DREAM OF BUT DO NOT PUT OUR DREAMS TO WORK. BEST WISHES FOR THIS YEAR AND MANY,MANY MORE.
Have a “Grape” Day and a sip for me.
You look MAHvalous! Much better than my thoughts have imagined. I’m so happy to hear that the 3rd skin concern was not a concern, after all.
Kristin, I’m sure that the doctor was speaking only on a cellular level. Skin issues begin behind what we can see ourselves. That’s quite obvious in your case as your skin is full of youthful dew and color.
Sometimes these things can be dealt with internally at the cellular level with supplements like sea buckthorn berry oil and omega 7 (as well 3,6 & 9).
xxxooo
Karen
(expected storms later w/temps 68 degrees F but it’s a bird-chirping and pleasant sunny morning right now)
Happy Birthday Jean-Marc, I thoroughly enjoy reading your blogs, what a lovely picture of dad and daughter
Joyeux anniversaire Jean-Marc! a bientot-Beth
Bonne Anniversaire, Jean Marc. Je suis desolee qu’il n’etait pas possible vous voir quand vous etiez ici a Asheville recemment. La prochaine fois peut-etre.
happy birthday, jean-marc! and, kristin, you are soooo beautiful. really!
Bon anniversaire, Jean-Marc!
Bon courage, Kristin!
Merci bien pour votre blog, votre site web, et votre infolettre.
You are beautiful lady, protect ur skin and take 50 mg of zinc every day a new study suggests that will prevent the basil cell problem, blaine
Joyeux Anniversaire, Jean-Marc,de Perpignan, une autre région vinicole! 🙂
Kristin, your beauty is breath-taking just as it is … and even moreso because it reflects your inner beauty.
Several years ago as i was getting a hair cut (wife asks, ” which one?” I respond, “all of them”) at the end the barber put a mirror to my head to ask me if my hair cut was OK to which I answered, ” well yes” and then she floored me with her response, ” well there wasn’t that much up there to begin with!”
Ouch!! tip just cut in half!
Happy Birthday, Jean Marc!! Kristin, you are tough, resilient and gorgeous and a SUPER MOM–what more could any woman want. I think that the dermatologist was trying to scare you into taking of yourself (a hard thing for kick-butt mothers to do)–we do need to put ourselves first sometimes (I think that I’m preaching to myself here). Have a wonderful birthday dinner. Jackie is gorgeous!! Mary
Happy Birthday Jean-Mark and thank you both for sharing so much of your lives with us. I feel as if you are personnal friends.
Hello dear French-word-a-day-madame, (now that mademoiselle has been ousted!) Kristen with the dewy skin and lovely visage….
I have never posted a comment on any message board, but your dermo’s comments irked me! Over the years I have spent much time in France – mostly Paris – and am a steadfast though somewhat reluctant francophile…There have been many opportunities to observe the marvelous and perplexing Gallic being…I would say your dermo sounds jealous! Ok follow her precautions but dismiss her unwarranted and unconstructive cut!
Thank you for your lovely words and the yarns around them…
Hi there Kristin,
think you will have to admit the consensus is that you are not only blessed with great husband and great son and great daughter but also great bone structure, great hair, great eyes, great smile, great ability to bounce back, etc, etc, so no need to worry about the doctor’s phrasing – I bet you can laugh at it already! It’ll make a great story….some day.
Congrats to Jean-Marc (what age is his skin???). And have a lovely Springtime, both of you.
L.
Happy birthday Jean Marc!!!! You have such a lovely wife and children..you are truly blessed……Kristin, I think that you are amazingly beautifu, as is your family…I believe that global warming and earthly changes to our ozone layer that normally would protect us from the sun is at fault…..we all have older skin than our age these days!!!!!!A good sun screen should be enough so that you do not have to live in a cave…..I also would go nuts if I could not see the sun from one day to the next…..Enjoy your day!!!! Susan from Alameda ca
Dear Jean-Marc,
Man, you must be so proud of your family and they no less proud of you!
Happy Birthday to one really great and dedicated husband, father, a man who created his dream with dedication and unrelenting hard work. Congratulations and may your birthday be replete with joy and love.
Exactly two months from today this vieux homme will be forty years older than that handsome man Kristi married. My best to you! Fred
Clearly, you are lovely inside and out–we know that from your writings, from the sterling quality of your family and friends, from your obvious energy and enthusiasm. That suture line will go away, you got a nice early warning on skin protection and none of this affects your ability to communicate with your readers three days a week! Good for all of us to know this is behind you.
Bonne Anniversaire à Jean-Marc. Merci de partager ta vie avec nous.
Bon Anniversaire Jean-Marc! Kristin tu es très très belle! I think your skin is youthful and simply gorgeous…matches your radiant personnalité.
Gros bisou!
Bonne anniversaire, Jean-Marc! I am sorry I missed your NYC visit, but I was out of town at the time. A la prochaine!
Best regards,
Tom
Jersey City NJ
Oh Kirsten, how I can relate to your story, 6 months ago I was diagnosed with a very rare cancer, melanoma inside my body, I too have been told, I must never expose my skin to the sun again, its poison to me, so now I go out with scarf on my neck, sunhat that keeps blowing away in the breeze, long sleeves, glasses etc etc, what a pain, but I guess if we want to continue in this life and lovely country, we must obey, wishing you lots of luck dodging the sun, my thoughts are with you ,from a pale and interesting (ha ah) Mandy Mullins
Hi Kristin, you are so lovely – inside and out. Birthday greetings to Jean-Marc, and wishing you all the best.
Kristi — I love it when you post pictures of yourself. You are truly lovely. Also, I love it when you read the French yourself because you also have a beautiful voice.
Thank you for these very kind words! Every one of them touches me!
Gus, you fooled me. I thought that was Mom speaking!!!
Mandy, trusting you are healed and doing well. Thanks for sharing and take good care–you are in our thoughts and prayers.
I think you look great Kristin!, your forehead has healed nicely. One thing to do is to warn your children to protect their skin at this early age.
Bon anniversaire! C’est le meme pour moit aussi!
Happy, happy birthday!!
Aw, c’mon! You grew up in Arizona! It’s a wonder you don’t look like a raisin! The sun here in the American Southwest will shrivel a person quickly if s/he doesn’t live in shelter or wrap up like a mummy! (What kid wears a hat?) I had to start wearing a wide-brimmed hat (think Scarlet O’Hara) and double sunglasses (not chic!) after moving to New Mexico because the sun made me nauseous from Feb to June. I am happy to say that is no longer true, but I didn’t cover my hands (Who wears gloves in summer??) so that the freckles there now look like age spots. :o( Look at the photos of Princess Grace of Monaco and you will see how she coped with the sun in that region. You still look young to me, Kristin. But do wear that hat!
Kristi,
Your inner beauty and strength shine through your skin! Thank you for being an inspiration to us all in so many ways. I am glad you are healing well. Happy Birthday to your husband!
Chief Grape, Happy Birthday and enjoy your day. Kristin, you look great, follow the Dr’s orders but don’t dwell on your looks. I really enjoy your writings, here in Sunny Az. Take care.
Sharon