The sign near the beach reads "SOS Lost Jewelry in the water." Here in La Ciotat, there's another place where people lose things… and it also has to do with water! Learn a handy expression in today's vocabulary-packed story!
Today's word: sur-le-champ
action qui répond sur le champ. A riposte is a lively, instant reply, made to an interlocutor [often one who has just asked a question] for an on-the-spot response.
After packing un panier-repas for my husband's lunch, feeding the hens, and working on a chapter for our book, I knew if I didn't pause to eat something I would quickly turn into an LSB–a Low Blood-Sugared Zombie! (Do you know the feeling?) Funny, LSB also stands for "Low Surface Brightness Galaxy" which could explain our brainpower when we run out of fuel… It could also explain the inversion of letters, above, but we're sticking with LSB–for consistency!
"Max!" I set down my paring knife. "I thought you were wearing your Dr. Martens to work?"
On hands and knees, I was now searching for the LMO–Latest Missing Object. (LMO also stands for a Living Modified Organism which is what I become each and every time my family pulls me away from my own morning race…to join their own wild goose chase!) Crawling around on the floor Max and I knocked heads. Aïe! Aïe! This was no way to start a day! What am I doing down here with the dust bunnies under the bed? I should've listened to my friend Sophie….
Spotting the missing botte, I let out a victory shout. "There it is! There's your boot. Way back beneath your bed. You go get it!"
It may not have been a sassy response, but it was quick–sur-le-champ!
FRENCH VOCABULARY
aïe = ouch
chiotte = toilet, crapper
chiot = puppy
jeune chien = young dog, puppy
sur-le-champ = immediate
Which of these puppies stole my French? A young Smokey and his sisters are scolded by their mama, Breizh.
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‘Whose stolen my hairbrush?’ The mid morning cry when we had teenage daughters.
My friend, knowing that chien is an adult dog, made the presumption that chiottes would be the word for puppies (little chiots). My friend put a handwritten notice in her local store, advertising that she has several of these chiotttes for sale. It was only when she buttonholed another woman and tried to interest her in the beautiful chiottes, very nice, adorable and at a good price to the right person, that she finally found out how funny her offer had been! My friend is now a fluent French speaker and has been telling that one for years, so she wouldn’t mind me sharing….I was also a novice, having moved to France around the same time as her but after hearing about her faux pas with the delightful crappers, I never dared use anything other than ‘petit chien’ with regard to puppies. Better still, I got a cat! Whew!
And how old is this Max……..? Do not llever un doit!!!
I loved it! And also the heart melting photo of the puppies. Chez nous, I am a frequent – well, The Only – receipient of the “Where is my” as well as a lot of “Where is THE”. There have been several already today and more expected. (In between fending them off, I spotted 2 rogue acute accents, both on repas, and thought you might like to bat them off, dear Kristi).
I feel for you, being the official ” finder” in our household. Lily’s and my favorite cartoon is of a man standing in front of a refrigerator with the door open, stocked entirely with boxes of butter, nothing else. The caption is ” Hon, where’s the butter?”
…you just have to laugh, and try not to bump your head!!!
The lost item is usually found in the last place you look …. (think about that).
Way to go, Kristi! Don’t let that French guy, however beloved, get the best of you, particularly after you make his panier-repas chaque jour (and do countless other things). It takes food to fix LSB (or LBS) but humor (even with an edge) and une bonne riposte or two will help you get through those morning goose chases. (I recommend Franglish too!)
I’ve always said to my children, when they couldn’t find a piece of clothing and asked me where it was, “Well, the last time I wore it…..”. They then went on to find it. I learned from my 59 year old son, just last week, that he now thinks the same phrase and then always finds the missing item. He thanked me for the useful tool. You never know…
Kristi,
There is a saying “it’s behind the ketchup “, which I often use. I am always helping my husband find something and mostly it is his phone. He has it only on vibrate, when we call it, you need to be nearby to hear it. Other times he has it on ring, a sonar ring, which is so loud you jump out of your skin. (Interesting saying!)
Love the picture of Breizh and her puppies.
Kathleen
Margaret, Many thanks for catching those rogue accents. 😂 Going to fix them now.
Hi Kristi,
I was hoping we would hear Jean Marc pronounce the phrase “C’est dans le chiotte” ….. haha
I’m going to remember that phrase!
i repeat another person above – How old is this Max?? future response could be – “How would I know? I do not wear them. ” and continue what you are doing. I hope you have a lovely day.
bonjour: always love your entries; I would like to send a check; please e-mail me your address again to:asorocki@suddenlink.net. Merci beaucoup!
Kristi – Good advise above, but missing the humor, I’m afraid.
I LOL’d on Jean-Marc’s fitting remark about your french and your riposte – sur-le-champ! Haha! I hope you both had a good laugh – what an enjoyable read!
Bonjour, Kristi,
After the third free find, you might consider requesting a finder’s fee. What is the French for finder’s fee? I loved the
cute little Golden Retriever puppies. My Golden Retriever could locate anything with his nose! He was a great finder!
Hihihih…Kristi, as I am reading your blog this morning my roommate aka youngest son asked me, “where are all the large cups?’ mon sur le champ, ” Je ne sais pas, je ne suis pas la guardienne des tasses!’ in which he replied, “well, who is then?”
To this one…’silence is golden’…..
Bon courage, mom:)
Enjoyed your post today! I think we’ve all played the “finder” role! And can relate! Loved your “sur-Le-champ” riposte to J-M!
Our dear Kristi,
Once again ,today’s post has wrapped us in smiles!!And,in my case,gives me hope for all my who-knows-how many- mispronunciations and faux pas in French!
You most definitely are a wonderful maman(and femme!!),and!! Needless to say,author!! What pleasure to look forward to your posts!!
Love
Natalia. Xo
When I was a kid my mother would always say “Pray to St Anthony (patron saint of lost & found, I think). We would say “Dear St Anthony, please come around. Something is lost and must be found.” I can’t begin to count how frequently friends & family have found something when we’ve recited the prayer. Everyone laughs about it and when they find the lost item I say “See ‘ It works!” I don’t know if a similar Tradition exists in France but we have fun thinking St Anthony is searching with us!
Hi Kristi – I love stories of the innocent but humorous mistakes we anglophones make when trying out our French. When jet-lagged upon my arrival in Paris, I stopped at a coffee bar. The gentleman standing next to me nodded a “Bonjour” and I returned the greeting. Eager to practice and believing the topic of weather was safe, I indicated the approaching clouds and asked, “Est-ce qu’il va pleurer demain?” He laughed and answered, “I hope not! ‘Pleurer’ means ‘to cry.’” Oops! That is one way never to forget that “pleuvoir” is the verb for “to rain.” Good thing I didn’t try to admire someone’s cute little “chiotte.” By the way, your family is blessed to have a loving mom like you. – Janet
The photo of Breizh with her babies just brought tears to my eyes. I remember so well your stories of her many years ago. What a beauty!
Thank you, Janine 💕
Another Mom favorite to hear is “Who stole my …?” (insert lost object) I sometimes used to answer, “How much is it worth to you?”
Love the puppies photo! Just may have to paint that!
It’s in the male genes to not be able to find things. Love that picture and when you posted it so long ago.
Loved this post as it made me almost cry with laughter. In my house when either my husband or sons ask ‘I can’t find the (insert item). Where is it?’ the answer is always ‘Have a girl look not a boy look.’ Funnily enough ‘a girl look’ usually works.
Yes there is, or there used to be…
when I was a child, so long ago, my french grandma had us kneel
and pray to St Antoine de Padoue whenever she could not find her wallet, and it worked…
Yes, it used to work.
When I was a child, so long ago, my French grand- mother had us pray to Saint Antoine de Padoue whenever she could not find her wallet…
I avoid some of the “where is the…?” by having standard places for things. The ironclad rule for my keys is to hang them on the hook on the wall that you see as soon as you open the door; the hook is part of a brass decoration in the shape of a sailing ship. And my phone “lives” in my purse when it’s not being used.
I haven’t made any mistakes of the type described today in French, but have done so a few times in Russian; everyone roared with laughter.
This post was fun, including “pleurer” instead of “pleuvoir.” Maybe if times are sad, one could say the sky is crying.