I am busy looking up the term bénéfice du doute–all the while doubting this is the way to begin today's letter. I am numbed, saddened, and shaken by the carnage in Las Vegas, as well as by the hurricaines and earthquakes, and by more local terrorism. Two girls, cousins my daughter's age, were stabbed to death Sunday–at the Gare St Charles in Marseille. Only a few weeks before, in the same train station, 4 young girls, fellow Americans, survived an acid attack. Our thoughts go out to these victims and their families and we send our support (feel free to recommend charities in the comments box. My friend Jo Ellen listed this one, for Puerto Rico, and Margaret listed The Red Cross. Thank you!)
As we all attempt to process these atrocities, let's remember to be respectful to others. This is a tempting time to point fingers at or ridicule those around us. There is an urge to find somebody to blame or someone to be the dunce when none of us truly know what will happen next and therefore how to prepare for it.
A few days ago a reader angrily signed off my newsletter. Referring to a post in my archives, she accused me of caring more about my broken fountain than the hurricaine in Houston. Reading her comment, I was stung by the power of words. Then, this morning, while scrolling through Facebook I saw, in response to the Las Vegas massacre, a cartoon ridiculing those who believe in God. It characterised believers as people who do not live in reality.
(Not living in reality? I thought of the past year-and-a-half–of the past 14+ years of facing each and every day without so much as an aspirin to dull my senses. But this essay is not about sobriety.)
I wasted a lot of time staring at that cartoon, trying to form a response in defence of faith. The more I tried the more fired up I became. And then I thought, What kind of example am I when I respond in anger? When I lash out? When I end up ridiculing the one who ridicules?
But it took my 20-year-old daughter to help me see things in a different light. Regarding the angry subscriber, Jackie said, "Mom, she is very upset about the hurricaine. She has to lash out at something."
My hope this morning is that my former reader will give me le bénéfice du doute. And that I may extend the same good faith–which brings me back to the cartoon depicting an atheist and a believer (both may have gotten a bad rap in that cartoon!). The two seem to have something in common after all. Both have to admit to not knowing what comes next, to whether or not one will take his or her next breath. And yet both, by their actions–whether by repairing a broken fountain or by parenting a child, demonstrate a belief in the unknown–or the as-yet-unreal tomorrow. A tomorrow which can neither be measured nor seen by the naked eye.
I leave you with a sunrise. Please leave everyone you come in contact with today with the same.
Amicalement,
Kristi
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Thank you for sharing this beautiful song. So uplifting and inspiring to see young people using their talents in this way.
Kristi, I can’t express the sorrow over all these events better than those above.
I can, however, offer some practical advice. I would advise everyone who wishes to donate to a remitted find to go to charity navigator.com. this organization rates charities based on what percentage of your donation actually gets to the recipients. Some charities spend too much of their funds on adminstration past and other operation costs. Sadly, the Red Cross is one of these, although their blood donor program is good.
The New York Times had an article listing specific good charities and exactly where there dollars were being used. I donated to AmericaCares listed in this article because it was benefiting Puerto Ricans specifically, and this us where I wanted my help to go for now. If anyone wants a link to the article, I’ll try to find it when I get to better internet service than I have for today.
Today’s reflection on ‘bénéfice du doute’ warms with magnanimity and wisdom word by word, Kristi, as you share the process of your tender heart. Thank you so much, and Jackie too. I am adding to my own prayers that distressed ‘righteous’ blamer who vented vs your natural attention to domestic beauty and peace, the fountain that is a positive symbol for us too. For sure, it’s our daily doings that keep us grounded and present, able to weather profound social pain and to reach out personally from our inner faith, whatever it may be. (After all, even an atheist believes/has faith…that there is no divine force!)
The beautiful comments inspired by your blog today offer awesome ballast too; together we shall make our way. As the saying goes, “We are all just walking each other home.”
Merci Kristen,
Vos pensees sont exactemement dans l’esprit d’amitie. Beaucoup des benedictions!
Margaret
Leslie, Courage to you and thoughts and prayers to your Mom, in ICU. I am glad you encountered Albert, experienced this happiness, and shared the cheerful scene with us.
ah-h a beautiful sunset…and soon a sunrise…the light continues to be there for all of us! You have a lovely and wise daughter; I love it when my children show depth and wisdom–I see it as living expresion of their hearts.
Our dear Kristi,
What a timely,needed and so much appreciated post today.
As always,you give us inspiration–even more gratefully received in these really troubling times.
Your words brought our attention to the absolute belief in knowing that,despite the evil existing,there is good,there are good people,kind souls.God hears our prayers for His light to prevail.
Sometimes the most challenging part is keeping open eyes to see.
Here in Vegas,we were moved to tears when we witnessed long lines waiting to donate blood;people–some obviously of limited means–reaching out with donations for those affected by this horrific set of events.One lady told me “Our blood is sll the same color.”
Such kindness and mercy are a beacon of hope.
Blessings to you,dear Kristi,and your beautiful family.
Love
Natalia XO
What a lovely thing to say Jules – and Kristin’s thoughts are truly meant. She is very honest and sometimes too hard on herself, but it does make me more generous and considered in my judgements.
Kristi, your compassionate and honest words remind me of the quote by Mother Teresa, “If you want to change the world, go home and love your family.” Amid the tragic events that have happened recently, I think that many people are feeling confused and angry, trying to find solutions and hitting a brick wall (and yes, also seeking someone to blame). What takes more work is seeking a way to create a community in dark times. Repairing a fountain is sometimes as much a work of love as is donating money to a family in need. Keep shining your bright light, Kristi. I don’t know about that other reader, but your words always inspire me and remind me to focus my attention where it’s most needed.
I just experienced two tragedies in four weeks. My father passed away in July and my mother lost her house and belongings during Harvey in Houston four weeks later. She is 85 and now living in a hotel. She looks forward to moving back home when everything is renovated, even though nothing will be as it once was. We learn and grow with our experiences in life and we never know what will come around the next corner. Be thankful for your family and friends and reach out to those that need you.
Kristi – beautiful words. Thank you.
Heart to Heart International http://www.hearttoheart.org/ Working with hurricane victims.
Medecins sans Frontiers – Doctors without Borders http://www.msf.org/
One of the few working with Rohingya in the Bangladesh camps.
Both organizations score 4/5 with Charity Navigator.
After spending hours watching the news after the Las Vegas massacre, I felt so depressed and weepy! I carried on, however, went to the grocery store for food, but found myself drawn to every infant with its parents that I encountered. It soothed my sadness to focus on these beautiful, sweet, innocent beings with their glowing mother and father hovering protectively over them. I forgot my despair at “man’s inhumanity to man” and, in my efforts to elicit a smile found myself bathed in the pure joy of these tiny beings. What a salve to a person wrapped up in the horrors of the day! The hope and optimism of the future lies in our children!
Dear Kristi, You and your faith in God are beautiful blessings to all of us. Your Dear Jean-Marc and your Mama and Jackie and Max are blessings to us all, too. Such bountiful wisdom from your daughter!! Lots of Love, C-Marie
Thank you Kristi for a wonderful, thoughtful reminder to treat each other with respect. It often seems that to be ‘tolerant’, Christians must respect an atheist’s view whilst many atheists do not seem to ‘tolerate’ Christians well, treating them as objects of ridicule. At times like this, we are reminded of our common human vulnerability. We can’t stop some things happening, but in every moment we can choose how we treat others and atheist and Christian alike may have hope for humanity with each new sunrise.
A beautiful heartfelt post one of your best written. These are strange times we live in and we know not what tomorrow will bring,,,sunrise and peace I pray as you do,, let us reach out to one another and keep the circle of faith, love, peace, and freedom alive in a circle around the earth,,,,
Lovely words. Thank you.
Merci, Kristi. I read all your posts, but don’t often leave a comment. Your words today were calming and hopeful, even in the world as we know it today.
People call this world “the new normal”. I am scared that this might be true.
YET, perhaps there are enough of us that share your philosophy, and can make it better, one by one by one. Thank you.
Lorraine
A little bit of faith and science together go a long,long way. Jules,please go back to writing in capital letters. I always look for your
postings. The relationship that you and Kristi have is precious. I am lucky,too, to share the same bond with my daughter. Love to you both.
Bless you, Kristi
Thank you for this moment of peace in a world full of turmoil! Very well said…
I am with Robbie Lane Jackson all the way and FIE on your reader who needs to vent her own hangups on YOU.
Rethink your comments, reader who criticizes Kristin for the content of her blog. IT’S HER BLOG. Not yours.
Thanks, Kristi, for keeping things in perspective.
The truth is that in the midst of so many sad stories around the world, only faith and positive thinking can keep up going and give us any hope of making the world a better place. Here’s to positive thoughts and faith – no matter what that involves for each and every one of us. And here’s to sunrises.
Very thoughtful words. Thank you.
Kristi
I agree, you are hard on yourself at times but your words today are very soothing and heartfelt. If only we could all take a step back and quit reacting to everything someone says, I admit I have been there especially since this last election and being angry with everything . Things like this bring us back to reality and what is important. What anyone who has suffered with all of these tragedies would give to have that luxury and not be worried about shelter or food,water or having lost a loved one.
About the Houston hurricane – sheesh. Don’t worry about it. American media is even more Politically Correct -bound now than before. She thinks you live in America.
Thanks for the beautiful idea of a sunrise. The picture was lovely and I love the idea of being or bringing a sunrise to those we encounter during the day. It’s an image that resonates — with light, new beginnings, continuing life, hope, and the blessed feeling of being at one with the Earth and all its life.
Kristi thank you for taking the time to respond to the critics in such a loving a way. You are so genuine and sensitive and the dialogue you create with your followers is one of kindness, gentleness and respect, and we all know the world needs a lot more of this. And thank you for the lovely sunrise. It is a new day, I will rejoice and be thankful!
Sometimes you are so profound. This time it is Jackie. No wonder this old person keeps reading your blog.
I bless you for exploring different opinions and outlooks. This has turned into such a crazy world, we don’t know who to follow or try to understand. Yes, the sunrises are a wonderful tool to use. I wish all of us could set that up in our minds each and every morning.
<3
so sorry ~ the above post was supposed to become a HEART. somehow, it didn’t translate on this page.
It’s a sideways heart and lovely Janet….