Earlier this week, on Facebook, I posted Snoopy's message (even if I didn't believe a word of it): Chaque fois que tu trouves de l'humour dans une situation difficile, tu gagnes.
une broutille (broo-tee)
a trifle, a small matter, a little thing, nothing
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perdre son temps à des broutilles = to waste one's time on unimportant matters
se préoccuper de broutilles = to focus on insignificant details
s'inquiéter pour des broutilles = to worry about nothing
se disputer pour des (ou une) broutilles = to fight over nothing
A Day in a French Life… by Kristin Espinasse
On Monday morning I quietly packed an overnight bag and left it on the edge of my bed. Next, I drew a few deep breaths, clicked open my blog, and began searching the archives for a post to rerun. Though I have gone to work and written stories under more nerve-racking circumstances, this time the energy-fueling crisis could not be put to constructive use–not even for sentence construction (emotional turmoil can be an adept wordsmith).
As I searched for a story to repost, I stopped, now and again, to contemplate the packed bag. If it eventually disappeared from the edge of the bed, it would be the first time in 19-years of marriage that I dared employ Plan B (a night spent alone at a cheap hotel…to think things over). But what would a little room cost? I wondered. I'd spend 60, at least… Surely I could get an off-season room in Bandol for 60/65…? Maybe they'll offer a discount if I stay a week. Will I stay a week?
Don't think about that right now, I told myself. Wait for that "still small voice" inside to guide you. Meantime, one step in front of the other… Get your work done and then you can decide what to do.
I walked on in ignorant bliss until, suddenly, my smile fell and I froze in my tracks. The drain? He is not going to put that vacuum attachment down the drain!
Electricity is a big bone of contention in our household. Over the two decades that I have lived with Jean-Marc, I have watched him dabble in DIY work. He is no good at it, he admits, but that doesn't take away his enthusiasm–nor do the trips to ER when he slips! Lately, after long discussions with my mom, I have learned to see Jean-Marc's DIY adventures in a new light: not only is he extremely curious, but such projects are his way of expressing himself–unleashing his inner-artist! Thus, we have the velcro-taped GPS in our car and the duct-taped mop-spear. The perfectionist in me winces at each of my husband's latest "solution creations" which lack for visual esthetique. But, lately, thanks to Mom's help, I can smile at them and even begin to appreciate the quirky man-made fix-its. And I can almost overlook my husband's obsession with refitting all the electric cords (on the microwave, the TV, the lamps…he seems fascinated by the anatomy of the cord. He itches to reveal the wires within the black rubber conduit).
But I draw the line at electricity and water.
"There is a plastic bottle cap stuck in the drain and I am going to vacuum it out!" This, Jean-Marc states with intention, for he knows that I will go hoarse trying to talk him out of it. "The drain is dry," he adds. "There is no worry about water!"
I pause, knowing that if this conversation continues it will continue at a great expense. Listen, I want to say to my husband, I get it that you need to do your thing. I get it that I am to leave you alone with your projects and schemes. I get it. I get it. But I will never "get" electricity and I am asking you to wait for the plumber to arrive. He's scheduled to be here, anyway, and he can get the bottle cap out of the drain!
Realizing that I was not going to let up, Jean-Marc let go, losing his battle with self-control. This happened somewhere between his urging to, "Trust me that I know what I am doing," and his final desperate plea: "LET ME LIVE MY LIFE!"
I did trust him to know what he was doing and I did want him to live his life (obviously!). Only, as I so often tell our son, "It isn't you I worry about. It's the other drivers!" (Here, it isn't Jean-Marc I worry about. It is the water and the electricity!)
***
Back in my bedroom, having closed the door on the verbal gunfire that raged on, solo, back in the living room, I tell my daughter: "Get your bag, we are leaving for school now." Only, when I open the door, there stands my husband, goggle-eyed, arms rising up and down.
I stood completely silent and still before the stunning bottle cap-and-vacuum spectacle, not a single of my limbs in motion, yet inside my arms were flapping wildly and my mouth thundered just like his. I was just as riled as he was, only I managed to keep it all tucked neatly inside as I walked right on past the live wire and out the door.
I don't know how I happened onto the site of a photographer based in Memphis, but I stayed to study every single photo in her touching self-portrait exposition, in which she photographs people sneering or mocking her (seemingly unbeknownst to her) because of her weight. Artist Haley Morris-Cafiero writes:
For my series, Wait Watchers, I set up a camera in a heavy-traffic, public area and take hundreds of photographs as I perform mundane, everyday tasks as people pass by me. I then examine the images to see if any of the passersby had a critical or questioning element in their face or in their body language. I consider my photographs a social experiment and I travel the world in an attempt to photograph the reactions of a diverse pool of passersby.
I have always had a hard time controlling my weight. My uncontrollable exterior has determined my place in society and I have often felt left out and awkward.
The artist's words hit hard and for the first time I realized that, though we all have struggles and vices, some of us have the added humility of having to wear their uncontrollable sides on the outside–weight and temper being two examples. With this thought came a wave of compassion for all who suffer from outward expressions of their inner conflicts.
Jean-Marc calmed down in time to bring me wildflowers in an attempt to reconcile. Accepting them, I was unable to curb my impulse to point out HIS faults. (I didn't see it as humiliation at the time but–like using a blow torch to put out a lighted candle wick–such words were crushing and unnecessary… and only served to fuel the flame!)
By the third bouquet of wildflowers (it took days–and many bouquets–to reconcile…) I began to see some of my own vices, trickier for myself, or others, to identify as they are hidden on the inside: stubborness, self-righteousness, intolerance, perfectionism, the need to control, over-anxiousness–to name several. Unlike the overweight photographer or the short-tempered husband, I have the luxury of keeping my vices and sins to myself, though I endeavor to share most of them in the stories I write. Afterwards, I can't help but see the humor and the beauty and the value in the struggle of life.
"I'm uncomfortable when you talk about your struggles with alcoholism," one readers comments. Another writes, "Aren't you afraid you'll lose Jean-Marc–aren't you doing him a disservice by writing these very personal accounts). I worry some other woman will steal him away from you!"
Such notes make me cower back inside myself, and I think my writing days are over. If I cannot tell my story–through the lens of humor or whichever lens I'm using for a particular episode–then I might spend my time sorting socks (and some of you will agree yes, Kristin, this would be best!).
"But writing is your gift! Don't let intimidation silence your creativity!" my mom urges me (sure, she's my mom, Moms say that kind of thing… but I feel that kind of thing–not the gift but the words and sentences that will not stop filing across my mind, or chattering in my ears, until they are set down in story form. It is torture, but, three times each week, it is delivery).
Post note: Jean-Marc has always encouraged me to share my story. "If it is the truth," he says, "then tell it."
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Hi Kristin, I am new to your stories and just had to send a word of encouragement. A friend of mine sent me one of your posts a few weeks ago, and I appreciated it as a funny, helpful explanation of some French usage that wasn’t totally familiar to me. Today, I’ve learned that you have serious things to tell us also, and I will appreciate reading about them just as much. Please keep going! Reading your posts is like hearing from a friend in Provence, and who doesn’t want to have a friend in Provence? Sending all good wishes (meilleurs voeux) to you and your family, and looking forward to reading more from you soon. And congratulations on passing the 10-year mark with grace and good humor.
Hi Kristin, I am new to your stories and just had to send a word of encouragement. A friend of mine sent me one of your posts a few weeks ago, and I appreciated it as a funny, helpful explanation of some French usage that wasn’t totally familiar to me. Today, I’ve learned that you have serious things to tell us also, and I will appreciate reading about them just as much. Please keep going! Reading your posts is like hearing from a friend in Provence, and who doesn’t want to have a friend in Provence? Sending all good wishes (meilleurs voeux) to you and your family, and looking forward to reading more from you soon. And congratulations on passing the 10-year mark with grace and good humor.
Hello Kristi!!
This story is so awesome!! On so many levels.
Who hasn’t found themselves in similar situations lol! I guess we all ride the eddies of the flow of life. And then fall in love, yet again.
I think, that is the secret of a long and happy marriage. The ability to fall in love over and over again, with the same person.
I had to chuckle, reading through some of the comments, I noticed you are in luck! You seem to have a free, though possibly over educated, and under experienced, as well as woefully un informed, marriage counselor, who ‘knows best’ in solving all your ‘problems’, from a blog post no less! 😉
Thanx again for a delightful story.
XOXO
Missy
Hello Kristi!!
This story is so awesome!! On so many levels.
Who hasn’t found themselves in similar situations lol! I guess we all ride the eddies of the flow of life. And then fall in love, yet again.
I think, that is the secret of a long and happy marriage. The ability to fall in love over and over again, with the same person.
I had to chuckle, reading through some of the comments, I noticed you are in luck! You seem to have a free, though possibly over educated, and under experienced, as well as woefully un informed, marriage counselor, who ‘knows best’ in solving all your ‘problems’, from a blog post no less! 😉
Thanx again for a delightful story.
XOXO
Missy
A life unexamined is a life not worth living. I, for one, vote for your continued, truthful blogs. It takes courage to write as you do. We who read it are the lucky ones.
A life unexamined is a life not worth living. I, for one, vote for your continued, truthful blogs. It takes courage to write as you do. We who read it are the lucky ones.
It takes much courage to be as honest as you have been with your readers. I admire you.
It takes much courage to be as honest as you have been with your readers. I admire you.
I’m not cowered by cowardly threats, Jules – particularly so since Kristin lives in the land of the Cathars. If she is referring to my suggestion as “cynical, accusatory,” which it was not intended to be, then I’m sorry she is not open to it, and sorrier still if she is but too fearful to admit. In my defense, she is the one who brought the subject up! However, it’s her blog and her life and she is welcome to go at her own pace.
I’m not cowered by cowardly threats, Jules – particularly so since Kristin lives in the land of the Cathars. If she is referring to my suggestion as “cynical, accusatory,” which it was not intended to be, then I’m sorry she is not open to it, and sorrier still if she is but too fearful to admit. In my defense, she is the one who brought the subject up! However, it’s her blog and her life and she is welcome to go at her own pace.
Sargam….you don’t get it do you?!! Kristi is a WRITER…. you are a READER….You have no idea how much element of truth or fiction is in her writing and frankily it is really not her readers business to know…Kristi has complete control over what her readers are allowed to have insight into and how she creates her “characters”….it is her CRAFT to inspire, create emotions, to make us THINK about things differently to our own preconceived ideas….Kristi is now exploring harder and edgier topics using “characters” that we know and love… that is not to say that you reaction to her stories is not one that isn’t valid and is based on what you bring into her writings.
I applaud Kristi as a writer and, having followed her for many years now, am intrigued with her new style…artists need to reinvent themselves and push boundaries!! 🙂
Sargam….you don’t get it do you?!! Kristi is a WRITER…. you are a READER….You have no idea how much element of truth or fiction is in her writing and frankily it is really not her readers business to know…Kristi has complete control over what her readers are allowed to have insight into and how she creates her “characters”….it is her CRAFT to inspire, create emotions, to make us THINK about things differently to our own preconceived ideas….Kristi is now exploring harder and edgier topics using “characters” that we know and love… that is not to say that you reaction to her stories is not one that isn’t valid and is based on what you bring into her writings.
I applaud Kristi as a writer and, having followed her for many years now, am intrigued with her new style…artists need to reinvent themselves and push boundaries!! 🙂
How could I add anything to what has already been said except to say,perhaps, try to have some compassion for those who judge and criticize. I hope they are reading these comments and can see the joy, inspiration, and love you bring to your readers, and also the humor and the truth.
Stay true, stay strong.
Jackie
How could I add anything to what has already been said except to say,perhaps, try to have some compassion for those who judge and criticize. I hope they are reading these comments and can see the joy, inspiration, and love you bring to your readers, and also the humor and the truth.
Stay true, stay strong.
Jackie
Do not stop writing…we are here because we want to be, no one forces us to visit ..so continue to share and we will continue to enjoy every moment!
Caption: Chief Grape “Mmmm I know I have a beautiful girl standing next to me …but I wonder if the priest will lend me the microphone cord for my next project…? ”
Do not stop writing…we are here because we want to be, no one forces us to visit ..so continue to share and we will continue to enjoy every moment!
Caption: Chief Grape “Mmmm I know I have a beautiful girl standing next to me …but I wonder if the priest will lend me the microphone cord for my next project…? ”
Dear Kristi, I love your writing; the truth and honesty shine through.
In reference to some of the comments above, when someone is uncomfortable with something you write, that person should look to him/herself. When I find myself uncomfortable with someone’s personal revelations, I usually, on reflection, realize that I have the same “faults” or problems, and that I am trying to deny them. That feeling of discomfort is the clue to look further into myself.
Jules, have a wonderful time in Provence; enjoy every moment with your wonderful family.
Dear Kristi, I love your writing; the truth and honesty shine through.
In reference to some of the comments above, when someone is uncomfortable with something you write, that person should look to him/herself. When I find myself uncomfortable with someone’s personal revelations, I usually, on reflection, realize that I have the same “faults” or problems, and that I am trying to deny them. That feeling of discomfort is the clue to look further into myself.
Jules, have a wonderful time in Provence; enjoy every moment with your wonderful family.
Hi Kristin, Found your website only a month ago. I’m a fellow desert rat (from Mesa) and have been living in Germany for 15 years. Your tears while stepping on American soil to renew your childrens’ passport moved me. I can relate to that feeling. One can plant roots in a new country, but alas, we are always “transplanted” onto foreign soil.
I keep coming back to read your blog because of your honesty and depth. It you kept it light and airy in the ole American-in-French-countryside way I would have moved on by now. Kudos to you for telling it like it is. Our men can drive us crazy, but in the end, they are not the only ones with faults.
And might I also add that “retour de bonheur” is not on a post it on my iMac. I needed that today. Enjoy your time with your mom!
Hi Kristin, Found your website only a month ago. I’m a fellow desert rat (from Mesa) and have been living in Germany for 15 years. Your tears while stepping on American soil to renew your childrens’ passport moved me. I can relate to that feeling. One can plant roots in a new country, but alas, we are always “transplanted” onto foreign soil.
I keep coming back to read your blog because of your honesty and depth. It you kept it light and airy in the ole American-in-French-countryside way I would have moved on by now. Kudos to you for telling it like it is. Our men can drive us crazy, but in the end, they are not the only ones with faults.
And might I also add that “retour de bonheur” is not on a post it on my iMac. I needed that today. Enjoy your time with your mom!
Kristin, please keep writing! I and so many others can identify with everything you write.
Reading your stories and accounts of the day make our days better. I had the good fortune to spend a some time with you and your family tasting your wine and I so look forward to reading what you are doing now and watching the children grow up. If others do not like what you write they don’t have to read it. Write exactly what you want from the heart and you will have follwwers for a lifetime.
<3
Diane D
Mansfield, MA
Kristin, please keep writing! I and so many others can identify with everything you write.
Reading your stories and accounts of the day make our days better. I had the good fortune to spend a some time with you and your family tasting your wine and I so look forward to reading what you are doing now and watching the children grow up. If others do not like what you write they don’t have to read it. Write exactly what you want from the heart and you will have follwwers for a lifetime.
<3
Diane D
Mansfield, MA
Sorry you deleted my reply to Jules and deprived me of acknowledging an outrageous threat. I understand that conflict – your preponderant subject as of late – is painful which is why my advice to you was sincere.
Sorry you deleted my reply to Jules and deprived me of acknowledging an outrageous threat. I understand that conflict – your preponderant subject as of late – is painful which is why my advice to you was sincere.
What a lot of fear people deal with. . . The 2 comments you mentioned were fear filled and not about to happen. People’s responses to what you write show a lot about where they are at the time. Hopefully you can “take what you like and leave the rest”–not letting it get to you. Thanks for your delightful sharing! Your Mom is right–just ‘cuz she’s your Mom doesn’t mean she’s not right! (My daughter and I go through this too!)
What a lot of fear people deal with. . . The 2 comments you mentioned were fear filled and not about to happen. People’s responses to what you write show a lot about where they are at the time. Hopefully you can “take what you like and leave the rest”–not letting it get to you. Thanks for your delightful sharing! Your Mom is right–just ‘cuz she’s your Mom doesn’t mean she’s not right! (My daughter and I go through this too!)
Dear Kristen.
Please keep writing. I love it. The most valuable lesson I have learnt in my life is ‘what other people think of me, is none of my business’. It has released me from much anguish and insecurity. If other people have issues with your story, that is their problem which they need to deal with it. Please continue with your story.
Best regards,
Lesley
(Sydney, Australia)
Dear Kristen.
Please keep writing. I love it. The most valuable lesson I have learnt in my life is ‘what other people think of me, is none of my business’. It has released me from much anguish and insecurity. If other people have issues with your story, that is their problem which they need to deal with it. Please continue with your story.
Best regards,
Lesley
(Sydney, Australia)
Your writing is so wonderful and truthful. Anyone married has had some bad moments such as you describe in your story. If they deny it, they are lying. In any case, the greatest literature captures the truth, and you do that very well. Thank you for your honesty.
Springtime is finally here in Oak Ridge, New Jersey, in the northwestern corner of our state. The birds singing, the frogs croaking, the new baby leaves and flowers do bring new joy – just as your blog, Kristin, renews my heart and mind. Keep it up! Love you, Diane
Your writing is so wonderful and truthful. Anyone married has had some bad moments such as you describe in your story. If they deny it, they are lying. In any case, the greatest literature captures the truth, and you do that very well. Thank you for your honesty.
Springtime is finally here in Oak Ridge, New Jersey, in the northwestern corner of our state. The birds singing, the frogs croaking, the new baby leaves and flowers do bring new joy – just as your blog, Kristin, renews my heart and mind. Keep it up! Love you, Diane
I am joining Jules to hunt down Sargam.
I am joining Jules to hunt down Sargam.
Kristie, Charles and I were traveling last week with Nan and Tom. When we read this story (the four of us get your blog, of course!), we were laughing because we know JM. It sounds like what he would do to get the cap out of the drain. I love it! I know it’s dangerous and I would be crying out, too, but sometimes you just have to let them be, I guess. We love all of you and enjoy all your stories you write. You are a most talented writer — don’t stop writing!!
Love to all — and to our Jules!
Kristie, Charles and I were traveling last week with Nan and Tom. When we read this story (the four of us get your blog, of course!), we were laughing because we know JM. It sounds like what he would do to get the cap out of the drain. I love it! I know it’s dangerous and I would be crying out, too, but sometimes you just have to let them be, I guess. We love all of you and enjoy all your stories you write. You are a most talented writer — don’t stop writing!!
Love to all — and to our Jules!
we should all be so open and honest! You’re very brave to share like you do and I admire you for it. there are times I learn from you and others that I feel validated when we have things in common. thank you for writing what you do and how you write it! bises
we should all be so open and honest! You’re very brave to share like you do and I admire you for it. there are times I learn from you and others that I feel validated when we have things in common. thank you for writing what you do and how you write it! bises
Jules has revealed herself as a bully. Since we are in truth-telling mode, I wonder what Kristin can learn from this, including the relationships she chooses. Do they tend to recreate her childhood conditions? Has she noticed how she tends to minimise or deny problems – ‘se disputer pour des broutilles’ being one in an ongoing pattern?
Jules has revealed herself as a bully. Since we are in truth-telling mode, I wonder what Kristin can learn from this, including the relationships she chooses. Do they tend to recreate her childhood conditions? Has she noticed how she tends to minimise or deny problems – ‘se disputer pour des broutilles’ being one in an ongoing pattern?
I love your writing! I just finished Words in a French Life and ordered Blossoming in Provence. Can’t wait to read it! Your words about your own “sins” reminded me of a Bible Study that I really enjoyed called Respectable Sins by Jerry Bridges. Don’t stop writing or being honest about yourself. I hope you and your mom are having the best week ever! p.s. once I ‘packed my bag’ and DID check into the hotel. That was 16 years ago and we’re still married!
I love your writing! I just finished Words in a French Life and ordered Blossoming in Provence. Can’t wait to read it! Your words about your own “sins” reminded me of a Bible Study that I really enjoyed called Respectable Sins by Jerry Bridges. Don’t stop writing or being honest about yourself. I hope you and your mom are having the best week ever! p.s. once I ‘packed my bag’ and DID check into the hotel. That was 16 years ago and we’re still married!
I agree with Kelly in Chicago:
Thanks for sharing: all of it!
Joan L
I agree with Kelly in Chicago:
Thanks for sharing: all of it!
Joan L
I’m late with my reply, having just caught up with last week’s posts. It’s been a busy time chez moi. Kristin, I’m not sure what else I can add to the above comments from the other loyal readers. I just want to send you a big, virtual hug and to encourage you to WRITE ON! 🙂 Writing a memoir, including mini memoirs in the form of blog posts, takes courage. This is something that I personally have struggled with, when it comes to writing and publishing material online. I don’t even post photos of my children on Facebook, so would I go about delivering a personal story that involves my family, to an unknown audience? And yet, there is so much emotion that we experience when reading your posts! We look forward to them. We laugh along with you, and we share your sentiments when you write about something that troubles you. That is precisely why we love your writing as much as we do. We relate to it. That’s what keeps us coming back. So, yes, you are doing something right! Both your mom and your intuitive voice continue to nudge you onward because that is precisely what you are meant to do.
Negative comments will come and go. I think many of us struggle to simply let those glide right off our shoulders and fall away, as far away as possible from our minds, and especially far away from our hearts. For every negative comment, you have many, many encouraging ones that, I hope, will keep you moving onward along your path. Listen to that voice, and let it boom louder than any other! It will not lead you astray.
I’m late with my reply, having just caught up with last week’s posts. It’s been a busy time chez moi. Kristin, I’m not sure what else I can add to the above comments from the other loyal readers. I just want to send you a big, virtual hug and to encourage you to WRITE ON! 🙂 Writing a memoir, including mini memoirs in the form of blog posts, takes courage. This is something that I personally have struggled with, when it comes to writing and publishing material online. I don’t even post photos of my children on Facebook, so would I go about delivering a personal story that involves my family, to an unknown audience? And yet, there is so much emotion that we experience when reading your posts! We look forward to them. We laugh along with you, and we share your sentiments when you write about something that troubles you. That is precisely why we love your writing as much as we do. We relate to it. That’s what keeps us coming back. So, yes, you are doing something right! Both your mom and your intuitive voice continue to nudge you onward because that is precisely what you are meant to do.
Negative comments will come and go. I think many of us struggle to simply let those glide right off our shoulders and fall away, as far away as possible from our minds, and especially far away from our hearts. For every negative comment, you have many, many encouraging ones that, I hope, will keep you moving onward along your path. Listen to that voice, and let it boom louder than any other! It will not lead you astray.
Hi-
Maybe some people read your words to escape problems of their own. Maybe others only want to read happy, cute stories. I think that your writing has come a long way, Kristin. You are you when you write about the imperfections. And personally, I prefer to know that you are a real person, not just a fairy tale princess! Most of us have packed that little bag at least once or twice and most of us have imperfections that we try to keep hidden. You are never intentionally mean-spirited or cruel. Jean-Marc gets it, I’m betting. Hopefully, he doesn’t think that everything should look perfect to the outside world. Keep writing!! Please!
Hi-
Maybe some people read your words to escape problems of their own. Maybe others only want to read happy, cute stories. I think that your writing has come a long way, Kristin. You are you when you write about the imperfections. And personally, I prefer to know that you are a real person, not just a fairy tale princess! Most of us have packed that little bag at least once or twice and most of us have imperfections that we try to keep hidden. You are never intentionally mean-spirited or cruel. Jean-Marc gets it, I’m betting. Hopefully, he doesn’t think that everything should look perfect to the outside world. Keep writing!! Please!
Hi Kristin! Your husband is right about writing your Truth. I think you are very brave to share it. Anytime you put yourself out there, you will ways have supporters and you will alway have detractors. Keep writing your Truth- you are creating a better, more hopeful world because of it.
You are truly beautiful- yes, you are easy on the eyes! But your beauty shines from the inside out.
Have you ever read A Moveable Feast by Hemingway? He believed the best writing happens when you write something Truthful.
In regard to the writer who worried about another woman snatching your husband (what?!)- I don’t think that would ever happen. Your relationship gives us all hope that true Love exists.
Angela
Hi Kristin! Your husband is right about writing your Truth. I think you are very brave to share it. Anytime you put yourself out there, you will ways have supporters and you will alway have detractors. Keep writing your Truth- you are creating a better, more hopeful world because of it.
You are truly beautiful- yes, you are easy on the eyes! But your beauty shines from the inside out.
Have you ever read A Moveable Feast by Hemingway? He believed the best writing happens when you write something Truthful.
In regard to the writer who worried about another woman snatching your husband (what?!)- I don’t think that would ever happen. Your relationship gives us all hope that true Love exists.
Angela
Sargam, Jules is most definitely NOT a bully. She is a loving mother whose instinct is, as it should be, to protect her child when she perceives that child is under attack. Would you please BACK OFF of your judgments of Kristin’s marriage and her relationship with her mother? There is a lot of ugliness in your comments–the ugliness of projection and judgment. I find myself wondering why you keep reading Kristi’s blog when you express such disrespect of her. And yes, judgment is disrespect. So get off your high-horse and back off. You don’t know squat about who she really is or what she needs or what the nature of her relationship is with her mother. Have some humility, please! And go work on your own issues somewhere else.
Sargam, Jules is most definitely NOT a bully. She is a loving mother whose instinct is, as it should be, to protect her child when she perceives that child is under attack. Would you please BACK OFF of your judgments of Kristin’s marriage and her relationship with her mother? There is a lot of ugliness in your comments–the ugliness of projection and judgment. I find myself wondering why you keep reading Kristi’s blog when you express such disrespect of her. And yes, judgment is disrespect. So get off your high-horse and back off. You don’t know squat about who she really is or what she needs or what the nature of her relationship is with her mother. Have some humility, please! And go work on your own issues somewhere else.